Wednesday, 25 January 2012


She said you collapsed 
And died in her arms
She wrote letters about it

It's understandable
It's true, mainly

And when I slept in your bed
I pretended I was religious
So who am I to talk?

Thursday, 19 January 2012


Sometimes, these conversations happen in taxis:

Driver               You going to the clinic?

Passenger       Yeah

Driver               Got an appointment there?

Passenger       No, I work there once a week

Driver               Oh yeah? What do you do?

Passenger       I give legal advice

Driver               What, like health insurance?

Passenger       No, social welfare law

Driver               What, like benefits and stuff?

Passenger       Yeah, stuff like that.

Driver               Tell you what, the other day, I picked up this Somali woman from Ikea. She'd just bought a big wardrobe. Massive, it was. Only just got it in the back. I told her it was a fiver extra and charged her fifteen quid. And she was like, "no no, ten pounds, ten pounds!" Anyway, when she paid me, she opened up her purse and she had dozens of fifty-pound notes. Couldn't believe it.

Passenger       Right

Driver               That's all benefits, that is

Passenger       How do you know that?

Driver               It's obvious isn't it?

Passenger       No, not really

Driver               They're all on benefits though, aren't they, the Somalis. Especially the women

Passenger       Well, most of my Somali clients have jobs. In fact, most of them have more than one job. Especially the women

Driver               I don't believe that for a minute, love. Are you one of those liberal, "don't have a go at the immigrants" types?

Passenger       I don't really know what I am but I do know that in my experience people on benefits are white and black. It's pretty mixed really.

Driver               Nope. Don't believe that for a minute

Passenger       Okey dokey       

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

A List

Pope Benedict said recently that gay marriage threatened to undermine 'the future of humanity'. 

Below is a list of things that are condoned - both explicitly and implicitly - by the Catholic Church.

Rape, violence and war

The hoarding of wealth while millions starve

Uncontrolled breeding

Poverty and overpopulation

Prohibition of contraception


Death from illegal abortions

The endorsement of dictators

Institutional misogyny

The murder of homosexual men and women

Aggressive proselytism

Lack of education for the poor

Lack of autonomy due to a fear of God

Just saying...